Unlocked - Book Review

The second book that I pick up as part of Blogchatter book review for the 2020 e-book carnival is another gem - 'Unlocked' by Sonia Dogra. She's been one of my favourite bloggers since the time I came back to blogging and now one of my favourite author's of the series too.

Book Intro - Cover And Title

Do you see a number of images of historically significant people in the back ground accompanied with barrels and footballs and submarines and yes whiskey bottles!! And to add to the suspense goes the title of the book as 'Unlocked'.

For all the suspense thriller book fans out there behold, for here comes a lyrical suspense thriller your way! And to top it all, the thrill is around something that you thought you were happy you mugged it all up when they were presented to you in those fat school textbooks and waded through the exams somehow... But wait... It need not be all washed off into history! For history is back ....and is back in such taste.... that this time you will gulp it all down with awe and even crave for more!!

Sneak Peek Into The Book

Genre - Again this time too I picked up a book in the genre of poetry but this one's unique. History in poetic verses is something I could never imagine was even possible. But here is a book which is bound to capture your attention and 'Unlock' those tales of history that you might have heard of (or should I say mugged up) and forgotten or will introduce you to a totally new discovery leaving you spellbound.

Characters & Theme - The book is divided into two parts.

Part one speaks of significant figures in history that of Adolf Hitler, Mahatma Gandhi, Genghis Khan, Muhammad Ali, Cleopatra etc each entwined in verses of an intriguing tale to tell. Famous figures of history whose names must be imprinted in everyone's mind but did you know of the childhood of Hitler or the Sergeant credentials of Gandhi.... What's the tale behind Genghis Khan's gravestone or Muhammad Ali's lost gold medal....everyone knows about Cleopatra's beauty but what's with her nose!!

And the best part is when the book highlights the tales of the unsung heros and not to forget the bravery of the '(S)heros' (no not Rani Lakshmibai...and yes there are many other lady warriors who fought like a woman!). The poetic tales of those valiant few that the textbooks forgot or chose to forget to cover.

Part two of the book speaks of some epoch episodes in the history of time. Be it the story behind Radcliffe line or Kokura's luck or for that matter the bewildering tale of the sunk Titanic or the lost speech of Abraham Lincon....if this book was a game of Monopoly (did you know even this game has a story in history!) .... Let me assure you....you would end it having amassed loads of wealth comprising of knowledge of historical times!!

Literary Sense - The author being a veteran in this field and having authored many books in the past.... this book is as rich in literature as it is in history. The literary usage in composition of poetic verses around historical facts is as commendable as is the research that must have gone behind in creating this masterpiece.

I personally loved the small prologues before every chapter. And the footnotes that the author has painstakingly put explaining every significant historical event making the life easy for the reader. Let me quote the book's introductory poem which perfectly summarizes the book.

"Well, I'm going to rummage my pockets
To look for some stories,
Tales about noses and mustaches
And those of unparallel bravery,
I'll talk of famous towers
A story you'll devour,
And of speeches and gunshots
War over football matches who
Would've thought
Also, some tales desolate and bereft
Of 'Harrowed Lines' and 'Quarantines',
And some unscrupulous 'Angels of Death'.
For isn't that what I'm supposed to be?
A vast chronicle of the good and the ugly.

All of this and a little bit more
I have for you so much in store. "

So, quoting the book again.... Whether "history is necessarily a result of accidents rather than social or economic forces or laws" or if "Somewhere between the wrinkled pages of history, lie untold tales of many a bravery"....so that " when history repeats itself and blatantly stares you in the face"....hope we learn something from that that had once passed or failed!

My Two Pence

Any book usually caters to a particular audience based on a certain age group but this is one such book that has the potential to impress a 12 year old upto 85 year olds equally. That's the potential it carries as this is a book in which you just don't marvel at the lyrical poetic verses but the book also leaves you with a whole lot of knowledge in History to cherish and chew upon. What more can you ask for! I wish history was as interesting during school days then probably today I wouldn't have to rake my brain to try and remember the names of all those famous people or the wars and the years in which they took place. After reading this book (thrice... Yes, I was that smitten!) now I know history can be made this interesting. This book should definitely be made available in a paper back edition to make it reach the kids and for their easy read while the adults can definitely enjoy the paper light e-book edition. My only humble request to the author is to add more historical poetic tales to the book..... ke dil abhie bhara nahi  :)! 

The link to download the book is here (free download for a limited period)

PS: The link to my own book 'Dots And Streaks' is here (free download for a limited period)

Mythological Monologues - Book Review

Let me first of all thank Blogchatter for giving me this opportunity to not only get to read the book Mythological Monologues (which I had tabled for reading as I had unfortunately missed to read the posts during the A2Z challenge),  but I also am thankful to  Blogchatter for giving me an opportunity to review this very book as a part of the assigned book review process.

Book Intro - Cover And Title

As the title of the book goes "Mythological Monologues" very aptly describes what the book is about that is monologues of various mythological characters but in no ordinary style. The monologues are in poetic style of the various epic characters of Ramayana and Mahabharata. Each monologue is an introspective rendition of the mythological character from his or her perspective and pedestal.

The cover page depicting the peacock feather on a yellow silk is very symbolic to the mythological character Govind. But the aura of mythology is not limited to the cover or for that matter to the distinctive dedication. The peacock feather also accompanies you all along carrying with it the essence throughout till the end of the mystical mythological journey.

Sneak Peek Into The Book

Genre - The book might be categorized into poetry genre and mythology based but it is a definite treat for even the non-poetry lovers clan. The narrative of each mythological character as depicted by the author is no less than a short recital like a sing song tale. Each recital deciphering the multifaceted aspects of the mythological characters like presenting the scene of Ramayan or Mahabharat as viewed from their eyes.

Characters & Theme - As the book is based on mythology all the characters are from mythology, taking you back to the memory lanes of those times when you would have either watched these mythological epics cast on Doordarshan or heard of the tales from your grandparents for sure. Most of the characters are important mythological characters and are known but what's intriguing is the perspectives of each of their roles which they played in the mythology battles. 

The book not only delves into the minds of Ekalavya, Bhishma, Arjuna, Draupadi, Sita, Bharata or Lakshman but also of those who have been termed as being on the non-righteous side in the mythologies like those of Karna, Indrajit, Kaikeyi. Not to mention some conspicuous mythological characters that the book has very well highlighted and brought forward their significance as well in the epics like Chitrangada and Urmila. And last but not the least my personal favorite was the monologue caricature of queen Satyavati - the ambitious queen who embraced her vices not batting an eyelid for the galore of judgments! 

Be it the heart rendering and blood boiling scene of Draupadi's vastra haran or the spine chilling scene of Abhimanyu's killing on the battle field or for that matter the earth shattering scene of Janaki deciding to reunite with mother Earth renouncing her ever giving altruism the book describes the contemplation of each character adorning their thoughts in poetic verses of monologues. 

Literary Sense - Considering that the author hails from the field of literature and is an experienced author, the book is rich in terms of literary usage. And when accompanied with the richness of mythology weaved in the interplay of poetic verses it sure leaves the reader mesmerized.

A few quotes from the book that are my personal favorites:

Chitrangada

"All my dilemma dissolved into thin air,

I gave up my borrowed beauty, 

And returned to the woman that I am"

Draupadi 

"I am the chosen one

Chosen to fight various battles

I may be battered

I may be tired of fighting and losing,

Yet I am fiery and opinionated 

Beautiful and compassionate 

Because I have the lord by my side"

Bhima

"I would never forgive myself

For failing Panchali on that fateful day

Panchali - the strong opinionated woman

Whose fearlessness always inspired me

To be a better man and a better warrior"

Abhimanyu

"I-Abhimanyu died like a brave, noble warrior

People will talk about my bravery for ages,

Whereas my murderers will always be

Looked down for their cowardly act.

In my defeat, I triumphed

Through my death, I became immortal."

Partha

"How desperately we humans love

The deceptive blanket and material ties!

How fiercely we humans think

Our existence would lose all meaning without them!

How dangerously we humans are

Chained in the web of illusion and attachment! "

Kaikeyi

"An ideal wife, mother, warrior

I claimed to be with foremost pride.

I was oblivious when the seeds of desire

To be better than queen Kausalya

Gave birth to a poisonous tree

That destroyed my Arcadia."

My Two Pence 

The concept, literature and the poetic style of the mythological monologues is sure to capture your attention. The book in itself coming from an experienced writer is professionally done and is a work of art. Mythology as such has a lot to teach us and especially when the times are trying the subtle lessons coming from our good old mythology are a much needed reminder. The concept of what is righteous and what is not....good versus bad...right versus wrong and why things happen the way they do?! Does every thing that happens have a greater purpose?! Are they all part of a greater ploy of the almighty!? Does each soul choose its purpose its destiny its journey before stepping into this mortal life?! These are some of the questions that the book will leave you with. Mythology being my personal favorite subject this book was definitely a treat for me to delve into. To just read the book it may take an hour with the lucid style and flow of the poems but to absorb the book in it's entirety and bask in it's true essence each poetic monologue is to be savored. This is one such book, the essence of which, even after turning the last page will still stay with you. Although the world has migrated to a more paper light platform of Kindle I personally would recommend to definitely endeavor to print this book going ahead to do complete justice to the work put in. 

The book is available at this link (free download for a limited period) 

PS : This being my maiden attempt at book review kindly pardon me for any shortcomings.

Link to my own book Dots And Streaks is here. 

Dots And Streaks

Young was still the dream

Almost in it's infancy 

When she started to scribble 

Disarray of  the lines

Weaving tales of words in her mind

When she started to scribble

A story declined, a story published

A child's fantasy afterall is meant to perish

But then scribble she still did

To escape the cacophony sometimes

Or so the haunt of the silences

Capturing the musings of life

Be it joy, be it sorrow 

Or just a life's ploy

When she started to scribble 

Anonymous to her other self

A soul known just to her words

An escape to that safe haven

When she started to scribble 

But, for the dream

A dream in hibernation that lived 

Young as ever even without any nourish 

The dream that was conceived 

To bear the writer's epithet 

When she had started to scribble

So, that's the story behind making of my first e-book (link for download below the post)  Dots And Streaks :)! A dream or a fantasy that I had cherished as a child to see my name as the writer/author just like those below the Tinkle digest stories or Hindu's Young World publications. But didn't realise when that dream of mine as a child went into hibernation mode for years to come.

It's only when one day I tumbled upon the A2Z challenge organized by blogchatter and jumped into the wagon at the nick of time that my hibernating dream woke up from it's long deep slumber. Had it not been for the blogchatter community that is the fellow participants of A2Z challenge (you can find the list in this post of mine) and their love and support during the A2Z journey I guess my dream of becoming an author some day would have still been in it's hibernation.

The challenge of writing one post a day and that too with my chosen theme of poems... for 26 consecutive days related to each English alphabet wasn't easy. But the difficulty was entwined with so much child like enthusiasm that it was fun for once to just go with the flow. Life has a way in surprising you I guess.... Sometimes you painstakingly plan every bit of it and the things never materialize.... And sometimes you just go with the flow and the things that materialize on their own leave you overwhelmed. 

Do you also have any such hibernating dream? Any such unplanned anecdote that life gifted you as a pleasant surprise? Do share your story alongwith the feedback on Dots And Streaks. 

The book trailer for Dots And Streaks is as below:

The link for downloading (free for limited period) the book is here. Happy Reading :)! Will look forward to hear from you.

Reflections !!!

March 26th, 2020

I was sitting lazily in my corner of the couch and scrolling through my e-mails. A routine activity more out of habit than anything else. That's when this mail from Blogchatter popped up announcing the A2Z Blogging challenge. Just then S came down after putting our 5 yr old to sleep.

S ( my better half) : Anything interesting?

Me :  There is some A2Z blogging challenge being organised by Blogchatter

S : What's it about

Me : Participants need to post 26 consecutive posts for each English alphabet for 26 consecutive days with Sundays off!!

S: oh that's interesting!!Enrol me

Me : What?!!!  Are you serious? You visit your blog even less than I do... And here I have not given it a thought... And you want me to enrol you?!! Did you even hear what it's about?!!

S: Yes.. I heard it... 26 posts for 26 alphabets in 26 days ....enrol me

Me : Wait a minute!  Do you even have a theme? And what if you enrol and can't even post 5 posts forget 26!!

S : You want a theme... OK wait... Ammmm...fine my theme will be travel... Now Enrol!!

Me: And who will answer my second question?!!

S: Why should I think so much... If I can't post I won't... And what if I can post... Then I will... Simple!! I will enjoy while it lasts!!

Me : Really?!! You think I should also enroll then?

S : Of course!! What's there to think so much?!!

Me : And what if  people don't like what I write

S : Ha Ha that's when they read your posts right!! .....You can put a disclaimer... Read at your own risk :P!!!

Me : What rubbish!! Then what's the point... It will be like writing for myself...!!

S : You said it... That's the point :)!

So, that's where it started for me. I enrolled finally after some thought and decided to go with the flow worrying less on whether I will crash or make it through. But then the Sheldon planner inside me doesn't really love the word impromptu you see!! So, I took an hour or two and chalked down a plan for each letter still undecided on the theme. And the theme evolved on it's own that is exploring the various streaks of life at large.

I having actually got back to blogging itself less than 1.5 yrs back after a long hiatus of 6 yrs (where was I... Lost running the corporate race... Where else?!) and this being my first ever blogging challenge in the blogosphere I was quite unsure that I will actually make it to the end.

I think the encouragement that I got reading the comments from fellow bloggers everyday in the morning kept me going. I didn't expect people will actually  love to read my poems just like I didn't expect I will see the finish line :)! I thank each one of them for helping me reach Z and complete my first ever blogging challenge. And of course not to forget the likes and badges that I got from Indiblogger community  (22 badges for 26 posts) which made each of my day !!

For a novice blogger like me whose track record of posting is probably 26 blog posts in a year to actually completing this challenge is like living in a dream. Yes it still doesn't feel real!! I think A2Z challenge is the best thing that could happen to me. I feel deeply obliged to Blogchatter for organizing this event. It helped me to find so much talent in one single place and that too on such varied topics and areas. The blogs that I read and the bloggers I came across are simply marvellous! Just reading their posts inspires you to write better and read more of them each time. I am just at loss of words to express how good it has been and felt looking forward to the comments, reading and writing all go hand in hand over the last whole month. The best April ever!! So much so that now that the challenge is over I do feel a bit lost!!

So, what next is the question!! While my friends and family are encouraging me to go for the book carnival too I am still pondering if that's a good idea. Being the recluse that I am I feel me having my twitter handle now (again thanks to my fellow bloggers who encouraged and advised me) is itself a great step and a take away from this challenge :)!!Let's see if I yet again decide to go with the flow or just settle down with this and catch up on my reading :)!

I will end my post here thanking once again each and everyone in the challenge the participants, the organizers, the readers and the Indiblogger community . Congratulations to all those who made it through and also to those who participated in the adventure :)! I wish I could read more than I did during the challenge... But yes, better late than never ofcourse!!

PS: A special thanks to the following fellow bloggers for their support and encouragement throughout the challenge.

Sonia Dogra - https://soniadogra.com/

Anagha Yatin - https://canvaswithrainbow.com

Sonia Chatterjee - https://soniasmusings.com/

Tomichan Matheikal - https://matheikal.blogspot.com/?m=1

Navita Bhatia - http://towardsbetterlifestyle.com/

Jyoti Jha - https://myviewsandreviews.in/zealous-city-london/travel-diaries/

Durga Prasad Dash - http://durgadash.com/

Srivalli Rekha - https://sri-lovenature.blogspot.com/?m=1

Nisha Punjabi -http://shimmeringsunshine.blogspot.com/?m=1

Darshana Suresh - https://dashyspeaks.blogspot.com/?m=1

Arti Jain - https://artismoments.blogspot.com/?m=1

Arti Punjabi - https://artipunjabi.blogspot.com/?m=1

Suchita Agarwal - https://talesofsuchita.wordpress.com

Dipika Singh - https://www.gleefulblogger.com/my-z-way-to-happiness/

Dr. Anita Sabat - http://www.anitaexplorer.com/2020/05/zealously-use-and-promote-geographical.html?m=1

Sundeep Dubey - www.rightpurchasing.com

CRD - https://scriptedinsanity.blogspot.com/?m=1

Swarnali Nath - https://thelifeandlightblog.com/

Shweta Suresh - 

https://thesoulsearchersite.wordpress.com/

Shilpa Garg - https://shilpaagarg.com/

And yes, to the one who helped me take the very first step that is participate in the challenge :)

My better half (who luckily scrapped through to Z too!!) - http://milesandexperiences.blogspot.com/?m=1

******************************************

Links to my A2Z blog posts:

A - Apocalypse

B - Beauty

C - The Clock On The Mantle Piece

D - Debris

E - Ego

F - Friendsip

G - Grateful 

H - Hope

I - The Ink Blotch

J - Jigsaw Puzzle

K - Knapsack 

L - Luck Factor

M - Mnemonics  

N - The Nightingale's Song 

O - Obscure 

P - Pastels

Q - Quintessential 

R - Rendezvous 

S - Social Distancing

T - Time

U - Utopia

V - The Venetian Masks

W - Words Words Words

X - An Ex Too Many

Y - Yesteryear 

Z - Zenith

Posted as part of Reflections for #BlogchatterA2Z 2020 challenge

Without An Epilogue !!

And one fine morning, there it was.... standing outside the Witch's door.....waiting with patience.... to befriend for eternity ...or so it promised!! Maybe it just wandered around....and landed there.... out of nowhere. Or for all you know.... maybe it was a mere coincidence afterall that it was right there..... when the Witch's glance fell on it!But then isn't life all about mere coincidences..... atleast in hindsight for sure!

Just like the mere coincidence of seeing that living breathing thing.... with a bark made of wood....  reminded the Witch of a day in the past...of another such coincidence ...that had ended without an epilogue! (Well, so much for being a Witch... to have hoped for atleast an epilogue from a wooden thing... She should have known better!!) A day that she had scrubbed off her memory.... and come to terms with.... but the traces of which remained....hidden inconspicuously with the skeletons of similar.... in her dreams somewhere. And sometimes.... deep in her slumber they all came together to haunt.... clad in white...ghost like..... but very much alive....chasing her... clawing their way back.....endorsing and re-endorsing their presence! And when she woke up with a start.... she was greeted with that familiar mock of those very ghosts... like you thought we could ever be forsaken!

It must be a sign...the witch thought....for what else could it be! Or maybe this time it will be a different experience....with a different end...a subdued tiny voice said from inside! Or am I again getting trapped in the same web of hope....a bait woven by my heart as always.....pondered the Witch! For that unmistakably is the smirk of my mind.... And I can hear it clearly say.... "Again... Really?!...gosh you ought to be brave" For all those innumerable smirks.... Instead if only that Pandora's box could just device a way out of the heart's say!  And they all keep saying listen to the heart... Huh, then how come at the end it's always the mind that ends up with that annoying nod saying... And I said so didn't I!! 

But maybe that's because the mind always believed in finite and always will..... whereas the heart as always is stubbornly tilted otherwise! Maybe that's why it's always the braveheart... And not the mind!! And come to think of it.... If hope was all finite ....then how would life have turned out to be!! So, for the sake of that myth called hope (just like eternity!!)....and that devil called hope.... only for it's sole sake... It was probably still worthwhile to believe in that mirage of infinite coincidences!And that so called hope..... or is it hoping against hope.... that out of those many coincidences ....maybe not all... for sure not all... but for those few ....just for those very few.... of the many..... that might be an epiphany!!Worthwhile even if it's just a placebo effect... what say!! Afterall hope has no epilogue.... does it!! 

So, yet again.... perched on her window sill...sat the gift.... accepted.....very much with it's wooden bark.... and the hope of a new promise again..... if not of eternity but of green leaves .....and maybe of an epilogue this time around!

Nain parindey, pagle do nain

Nain parindey, jaagein din rain

Pankh jhatak yeh ud jayenge

Aasmaan mein kho jayenge

Maghroor bade banjaare nain

Nain parindey, pagle do nain

  

Nain parindey baadal baadal

Khwabon ke sitaare chug lenge

Nain parindey chaand chura kar

Palkon se apni dhak lenge

Palak jhapakte ud jayenge

Sapnon ko apne ghar layenge

Mashoor bade matwaale nain

Nain parindey, pagle do nain 

Nain parindey roshan roshan

Andhiyaare saare dho denge

Nain parindey chhalke chhalke

Palkon ko moond ke ro lenge

Palak jhapakte ud jayenge

Gham ko bhula ke muskayenge

Majboor rahein sapneele nain

Nain parindey, pagle do nain

Nain parindey, pagle do nain

Nain parindey, jaagein din rain

Pankh jhatak yeh ud jayenge

Aasmaan mein kho jayenge

Maghroor bade banjaare nain

Nain parindey, pagle do nain

-----------------copied------------------

Is Santa Real!!!

Is Santa really there?
Asked the 5 year old looking everywhere
As he ran to check for gifts under the Christmas tree
Still no gifts....where cud Santa be!
Have you ever seen Santa Muma
Prompt came the next query of the day
And that's when came his way
My little anecdote with a tinge of drama
Do you see a red scarf on the snow man
That was gifted to me by my Santa, a real craftsman
Many a years back when I was little
And I had bawled....for I instead wanted a cuddly beetle
My Santa didn't have a long flowing beard
Or a crowd of kids around that waited and cheered
Neither did my Santa have a belly
That looked like a pot full of jelly
I didn't see my Santa on a reindeer
Nor in those red flowing robes that my eyes peered
But my Santa she very much was
Although she looked more like the grandmas
With her frail little wrinkled old hands
And glasses so thick that made her eyes comically expand
She wove for me that very red muffler
And made many a goodies to hog as if she was my butler
And I am sure wherever she is
From the blue sky above that 'tis
She is looking down at the red muffler with a smile
As our snow man sits by our window awhile
And do you see that white cuddly bear
Another gift from a set of Santas
When we lived life together without a care
So you see my dear..... Santa does exist
And your Santas will also come by.... the whole list
Sometimes in real
And sometimes imaginary that you will learn to deal
But nevertheless, every Santa
Will always bring you something under their big manta
And it's for you to count your very own Santas
And keep their gifts as momentos


Merry Christmas 2019!! :)

And the day I finally picked up the word "abandon" and added it to my dictionary....

Luckily the page that had "hurt" in the dictionary.... Wasn't a new addition... 

Sometimes... As they say... The strength is not in staying but in walking away... 

Sometimes... It's just not worth it.....it's just not worth you...

And why didn't you let me melt away

I am a candle for God's sake!!

The candle questioned me....

Because decades later... When I see you again

You are the only one who will be the same and remind me of this very day!!

I answered....

The Inconspicuous Room!!

She opened the door to that small little inconspicuous room and heard that creak she was half expecting. As if the door was alarmed seeing her and the hinges were either greeting her or were loudly creaking.....making her aware of their discomfort for waking them up from their deep slumber.

It had been years since she revisited that room of hers and she felt a bit unsure. The room got lit by the opened door as her eyes adjusted to the dim light. She wasn't really sure what she came to look for!!

Everything looked cluttered and she didn't know where to start. The room smelled that familiar overwhelming moist smell of dust laden old things stacked up and untouched. She looked around as if in a hurry to find something and her eyes rested on a small torn house flag. Which house was it in school... Was she 7 years old or more... She couldn't recollect. She only could see that 7 yr old stealing that house flag after the practice of march past for sports day because the PT teacher had ridiculed her and said she can never learn how to hold the flag properly. She smiled looking at that little flag.

Her broken doll lay their abandoned but it's eyes still shone in that dim light wearing that maroon laced frock.  It was wearing that silver chain of hers. She shook her head smiling at all those superstitions she had about that chain of hers and how much she loved that chain which her granny had gifted. Her half embroidered flowers with that wooden ring around them lay there. She couldn't remember why she never completed that embroidery!!

And there in a corner lied that English book. It reminded her of that class of 8th standard and that teacher's face who had made her read that entire session just because her English was broken and the teacher found it an entertainment to the class!!And she had read and kept reading!!

She sat on her rickety cycle and wondered where did all that strength go!! She wished she could repair the cycle and go for a ride on those very kachaa roads of that small town where she had first learnt how to ride it after many a fall and wounds that hurt. 

She rummaged around for her diary in which she used to make an entry every single day as a kid. But she just couldn't find it anywhere. Maybe that is what she came to look for. Her diary. She opened that  tin trunk of hers looking for her diary and marvelled at the falls that the trunk had withstood....the free falls along the stairs which it had to endure every single college year.... Before being tucked into the cloak room. She looked at the dent adorned trunk and wondered if she could ever lift it again the way she did end of college year!! 

And just then suddenly the walls of the room seemed to be either collapsing or dissolving. Before the walls could collapse on her she opened her eyes and looked at the clock hanging on the opposite wall. It was already late and her morning daily chores were lined up. Her fingers in an impulse touched the silver chain round her neck..... And she got up to go!! 

Into Oblivion!!!

It was a long while since she had last looked for that small tinted glass bottle. 

It took some time before she found two of them.  

The two notes of gratitude for the lessons taught neatly folded cylindrically went into the respective bottles.

The bottles labelled with their numbers. 

And after one last look she sealed the bottles and flung them into the sea with all her strength. 

The sea of souls. 

She kept seeing as the bottles slowly floated away blissfully into oblivion. 

Reminisces - City of Dreams!!

If I were to wander around alone... I ask myself... Where would I go... 

Which memory..... hidden in which crevice of you should I start with...where should I begin... And where does it all end... If there is an end that is.... 

Maybe from the very day I had stepped into you... With dream filled eyes... And was overwhelmed to be surrounded by those innumerable  teeming eyes..... crowding... all around me... Everywhere that I could see... The sea of eyes and the strength of perseverance in them...each with their dreams....each to their own....And each comforting the other silently... 

What's there in brick and mortar they say... What is there to re-visit them.... But there in lies some memories ....that always come to life when I walk into those very buildings....tall they stand as always surrounding those roads which were a daily fight with the unbeatable traffic and those unforgivable rains. Surprising that my heart yearns to relive those days again if time could be reversed... Never mind the traffic... Never mind the rains!!Seems like just yesterday that I walked through that very sub-way leading to VT station....

The fun and frolic of that childish banter with long lost acquaintances and few lasting friends...will always remain in those office cubicles and those street side lanes... And those frequented restaurants and road side food which were the only escape to the boring office canteen lunch... My eyes search for that lone bhel guy who used to call it as masala mudhi....and my mind sneers...isnt that too much to ask for!!

Those restaurants that we frequented.... Every weekend without fail.... That familiar smile of the head waiter who knew my menu choice by heart.... But the place said closed and shut .....and the sign was clear... Some things in life just can't be repeated....and are meant to be enjoyed fully while they last!! 

Those late night adventures to the sea face....the only solace that even if the whole city changes... With all those once loved and cherished places shut down or rebuilt... There will be one thing which will always remain the same.....along with a few others... Ganesh Chaturthi - Lal Baugh,Ramadan - Mohammed Ali Road and Kala ghoda festival... The irony is, the same me who used to fret when stuck in traffic infront of the marine lines....and didn't know whom to curse when once stuck in front of lalbaugh for almost the whole night during the festival... Is trying to relive them and is revisiting them as cherished memories!!

Maximum city.... that taught and reinstalled the concept.... Loud and clear... That vastness is not in spaces but in hearts and mind... And that life is not in anything else but in the daily pursuits....!!

And I hope....this is where I dog ear you... as my Mumbai chapter !!

Fog!!

She said to her friend... 

Good bye then!! 

And her friend said... 

"Life is long and world is a small place. We will meet soon.... "

But she believed in the opposite... 

That "Life is short and world is too big. We will never meet again... "

She smiled to herself and remembered the same friend's lines... On a wintery morning... The fog you are seeing was never there... It's only your state of mind... 

True that!! She wondered why she even looked for the fog... 

She always knew it was never there.....all these years.....but it reminded her of her friend.... And she stuck to her belief that....that lone childhood friend of hers who had priced anger over her friendship must be also looking for the fog perhaps.....sometimes maybe.... She must be also remembering her whenever the winter fog must be clouding the window panes...and must be trying to smell the fog.... Just the way she had taught her friend when they were kids... 

Or maybe that was just a belief... And the fog never even mattered...it just never mattered afterall.... And was never there....

She turned and told her friend.... "Goodbye"

A compliment!!

Few years back a doctor had instructed her... 

My child....scream....scream as much as you want....that will help you endure the pain....

But she never could scream....

And the doctor had said.... My girl you are really brave!! 

She never took the compliment.....

******************************************

Few years later....doctor told her 4 year old Son....

My child... You are so brave... Haven't seen a child not scream and cry for two consecutive injections....

And this time she took the compliment.....

Those familiar set of blank eyes!!

Once upon a time there was a Witch....the Witch loved to capture thoughts of people....people used to come to her on their own and vent out all their thoughts....and the Witch used to love looking into their eyes when they did that....

The Witch came across varied thoughts....and each one's eyes had something to offer....some that had deep strength stored in them.......Some that portrayed confusion....some that oozed negativity bordering on animosity..... Some that needed strength.....some in which there was a sense of admiration.... Some that portrayed deep attachment and closeness....some that were playful fun and carefree....Some that had the beauty of simplicity.....

And there was one set of eyes which was blank....completely blank.....the Witch...that she was a Witch.... loved to play around with thoughts of people.....and blankness was always her favorite play ground... She prided herself whenever she was successful in filling those familiar blank set of eyes.....although she never understood later that what she benefitted in doing so....but every single time she came across that blankness and filled them..... she just felt that sense of ecstatic feeling....the Witch that she was!! 

Till one day she realised that those set of blank eyes which she prided in filling this time....actually fed on her thoughts... The Witch's deep rooted thoughts....her weaknesses and her strengths....she unknowingly had eroded on her own thoughts in the process....which she had not realised....

And on realization.... when the Witch wanted to pull back her thoughts from those set of blank eyes....and peered into them....the blankness had swallowed them long....and a set of blank eyes stared back at her...again.....challenging back..... and point blank as ever!! Much that the Witch would have loved to take up the challenge....but with her thoughts eroded.....

The Witch could only abandon her thoughts with those blank eyes.... forever!! And leave them blank this time for a change.....!!

What would you miss....

So what would you miss.....He asked....

And I wondered to myself.......I don't know what I will not miss!!

I remember those last few days of graduation..... When we all knew we may never step into that place ever again.... And each one of us had gone around the campus on our bicycles clicking snaps of every nook and corner of the campus....and had hugged cried and promised each other to always keep in touch......

Just in our early twenties then....the first big reality of life had not hit us still....that life moves on.....with lightening speed....and promises don't stay.....only memories do....that too in glimpses!!

Now, when my days in Mumbai are numbered....I am just going around re-visiting all those places in the city....which had meant something in these 9 yrs...the longest time I have ever spent in one particular place....and this time in mid thirties....no more clicking of snaps....and no promises either.....

May be the answer to what I would miss is....again....a part of myself....which will always stay here....and will never get re-lived again....and will just remain as a glimpse!!

Yet Again.....!!!

She looked at herself
And laughed ....and laughed... And laughed...
Till she could see tears flowing...
And she continued to laugh...

Happy?!....
She asked...laughing...
After so many years....
Yet again....!!!

Clueless then...
Clueless now....
Lessons that she could never learn...
Till date....

Why some things had to happen
The way they did
She never knew
And she would never know

May be she had a knack for them
And self invited them....
To rediscover
The same thing.....yet again!!

And now. ..she could only laugh hard ....
At herself...For herself....
That was all she could do...
And she continued to laugh....

The lady opposite said

"You are not a superwoman"

And it reminded her of a day when she had sat in the night and cried helplessly before a practical exam because she just couldn't get the hang of any of the experiments and there was no time left to salvage the situation....her parents had told her don't worry........Just believe that you will be able to do the experiment and you will be able to..... next day when she went for the exam and with her heart in the mouth lifted the chit out of the box with the experiment name on it.....it turned out to be the one and only experiment she knew....

She thought to herself....

If I believe I can be one.....then only I will be one....

And she left the lady unanswered.....

Unknown Connections.....

So,  this February....the so called month of love.....in other words..... connections....I thought let me try and recollect all those small connections known and unknown....and see how many I can recollect......so here it goes

We had just shifted in.....S joined office....and I was at home trying to set everything.....suddenly the door bell rang and an elderly lady almost in her nineties asked me.....have you just shifted in my girl....busy unpacking are u....u look just like my grand daughter......u must have not set your kitchen still....please have these puranpolis...it will be filling for lunch.....wait I will send in my maid.....she will help you with all the setting.....

I was new in Mumbai.... Took a BEST bus from office to station....for the first time was experiencing the crowded bus and rains of Mumbai where I couldn't find my own legs and hands after getting into the bus let alone breathe...it was raining heavily and the traffic just stopped at a certain point and just didn't budge.....all the people in the bus got down making you forcibly get down along with them.....after getting off I had no clue where I was.....decided to follow the crowd assuming they must be going to the station.....but everyone seemed to be running without a care for getting drenched....and when it came to crossing the road in front of VT... I was zapped....I just couldn't cross and my umbrella broke with the wind. ....just then an unknown guy asked....shall I help. ..Before I answered he held my hand and helped me cross the road....and while crossing he took out a spare umbrella....gave it to me and said. ...here trees keep falling in the wind.... make sure u hold the umbrella tightly above your head.....and before I could thank him he disappeared in the crowd

Again it was raining heavily one day.....and with great difficulty I had caught the local and reached Wadala station.....but just could not find a single taxi for home.....after a long wait.....decided to walk down....wading through water up-to waist.....could see water snakes wading around in all the dirt and my heart skipped a beat.....just then a taxi guy stopped and said madam aa jao aap.....main chod deta hoon....he fit in as many women as he could fit in in his taxi and dropped us all

One day I had got really late in office....and was terribly tired....desparately trying to keep myself awake in the taxi.....suddenly the driver asked madam bura na mano toh main aap ke saath baat Karun.....aapko bhi Neend nahi aayegi and Mujhe bhi... .He spoke about his journey and hardships from UP to Mumbai and his family back home... His dream of buying a home in his village....and when my stop came and I got off....I forgot my laptop in his taxi.....and walked inside the society to my building.. .And he came running behind to handover the laptop!!

I used to take a fixed taxi in the morning to office......one day when it was raining heavily.....I came down my office building thinking today finding a taxi to station itself will be a challenge forget about home.....and almost made up my mind to look for a bus when I saw a taxi right in front of the office gate ....and it was the same taxi that I used to take in the morning.....madam aaj Bahut baarish thi....mujhe laga aapko taxi chahiye hoga ghar lautne ko!!

I was sitting in the waiting area for my doctor to come.....a little worried....one person with a broken leg along with his wife came and sat beside me....and started conversing.....the way he described his diagnosis of TB and it's long treatment was heart rending...but it was overwhelming to see the humorous way in which he put across each aspect.....I asked him what happened to his leg.....and he said oh that.. ..I was trying to play quidditch....and he winked...... and just then my turn came to go in.....and I was already all smiles.....

Our car had broke down in the middle of a busy highway and S and me were wondering what to do....three executives were standing at the bus stop with blazer and all....suddenly came and started helping with pushing the car and getting it started

I was quietly having breakfast at a corner in the canteen......lost that I had my checkup on that day.....and just couldn't take my mind off it.....suddenly a friend cum colleague just appeared from no where and sat across the table with his breakfast.....it took few seconds for me to register.....and  he pulled me out of my trance.....

And to many more such unknown connections which always leave you short of words!!

15 yrs old playlist!!

So after ages.....almost 15 yrs.....on a day I was feeling low for no reason in particular. ....I happened to hear to this song Dhaani from album Strings.....and it just took me back in the memory lane to that cubicle of my office space when I was in IT.....

And somehow I started playing one song after other....my 15 yrs old playlist.....Strings, Lucky Ali, Boondh Jal band, Euphoria and so many more.....and memories just came flooding back.....come to think of it I didn't want to leave my job in IT at that time because I used to get to play songs and listen to them while working....

As I was already on a trip down my memory lane I decided let me dare to go a little more back in the past and play the playlist I used to hear during my Engg.....It reminded me of my small black tape recorder which was my most prized possession.....I remember I used to switch on the tape first and then the lights of the room when I used to get back from classes.....how I used to ride miles on my cycle just to get my list of songs recorded.....

It reminded me of those blurred faces.....my room and it's minimalistic possessions. ...my trunk which was another prized possession of mine.....where I had stored all those little memories....my favorite course books, notes, gifts, wind chime, ID card, letters, slam book, scarf, snaps, year book, that small Ganpati idol, tapes....... and a piece of me.....locked in the trunk since last 15 years.....intact.....untouched.....eating dust somewhere in the corner of my parental house.....

Someone recently was telling me.....how can u associate Urself with things like that......why can't u disassociate and like things the way they are.....and I don't know how that even works.....how to not associate  with things?!

Old music and songs can really be so therapeutic!! They so easily .....effortlessly take you back in time....also remind you of frens whose favourite song it used to be.....and of places times you were in with crystal clear image of Urself at that very point in time.....almost like as if you your current self is a spectator to that very moment in time you go back to.....

And you realise how long ago that was....and what a long way you have already come from there......so may be there will be a time sometime in future too when u will think about ur memories of today.....and feel the same.....