Thursday, June 20, 2019

As Again....

Lost in my thoughts as I walk down the lane
That familiar feel of those tiny droplets
Falling lightly against the skin
Rejuvenating the lost feeling
Of the soothing gay drizzle
As again....

I cast a glance towards the clouded sky
And my mind immediately cautions
Beware, the ecstasy is short lived as always
As the drizzle threatens to intensify
My stride automatically fastens
My mind continuously measuring
As again....

And what if this one time I don't pay a heed
And don't break into that spontaneous run
To a safe haven
What if I decide to just be there
Stay put and take it all
My mind ponders with all it's inhibitions
As again....

Get drenched to the skin
Soaked to the soul
Will the pour wash it away all
Those broken moments
And all those scars
Or just retrace them
As again....

Or maybe it'll just make me laugh out loud
Seeing myself helplessly drenched
The merciless pour overpowering
With all it's strength
Awakening that deep hidden spirit
Of facing the sky
And letting the downpour hit hard
As again....



Friday, June 14, 2019

Reminisces - City of Dreams!!

If I were to wander around alone... I ask myself... Where would I go... 

Which memory..... hidden in which crevice of you should I start with...where should I begin... And where does it all end... If there is an end that is.... 

Maybe from the very day I had stepped into you... With dream filled eyes... And was overwhelmed to be surrounded by those innumerable  teeming eyes..... crowding... all around me... Everywhere that I could see... The sea of eyes and the strength of perseverance in them...each with their dreams....each to their own....And each comforting the other silently... 

What's there in brick and mortar they say... What is there to re-visit them.... But there in lies some memories ....that always come to life when I walk into those very buildings....tall they stand as always surrounding those roads which were a daily fight with the unbeatable traffic and those unforgivable rains. Surprising that my heart yearns to relive those days again if time could be reversed... Never mind the traffic... Never mind the rains!!Seems like just yesterday that I walked through that very sub-way leading to VT station....

The fun and frolic of that childish banter with long lost acquaintances and few lasting friends...will always remain in those office cubicles and those street side lanes... And those frequented restaurants and road side food which were the only escape to the boring office canteen lunch... My eyes search for that lone bhel guy who used to call it as masala mudhi....and my mind sneers...isnt that too much to ask for!!

Those restaurants that we frequented.... Every weekend without fail.... That familiar smile of the head waiter who knew my menu choice by heart.... But the place said closed and shut .....and the sign was clear... Some things in life just can't be repeated....and are meant to be enjoyed fully while they last!! 

Those late night adventures to the sea face....the only solace that even if the whole city changes... With all those once loved and cherished places shut down or rebuilt... There will be one thing which will always remain the same.....along with a few others... Ganesh Chaturthi - Lal Baugh,Ramadan - Mohammed Ali Road and Kala ghoda festival... The irony is, the same me who used to fret when stuck in traffic infront of the marine lines....and didn't know whom to curse when once stuck in front of lalbaugh for almost the whole night during the festival... Is trying to relive them and is revisiting them as cherished memories!!

Maximum city.... that taught and reinstalled the concept.... Loud and clear... That vastness is not in spaces but in hearts and mind... And that life is not in anything else but in the daily pursuits....!!

And I hope....this is where I dog ear you... as my Mumbai chapter !!




Thursday, May 09, 2019

Let it be!!

I wake up to the morning
With not so much of a glance at the clock
Which for years had usurped the first morning gaze's dock
With my need to time the time gone
With "no bus to catch" and no race of  illusion to run
No more fear of an opportunity gone that cost
And no pretentious applause to those strewn shards of self respect lost
Trying to emulate not urself but the mime
Quenching that unquenchable thirst for dimes
And yet against everyone's disbelief
That how could you let it be

I walk up to the French window
And tie up the curtains lace
To let the bright sun light up the room
And the beautiful day's face
With not so much of a hoot on how the day will go
What I plan to do next and tommorrow
I smile at their question on how can there not be a plan
And I wonder why is it that there always has to be a plan
They tell me that the strive for being extraordinary is real
And it worries me, if my heart yearning just to be ordinary a great deal
You have excelled so far and can't quit now is what I hear
Alas,  for I crave for that carefree heart who never bothered losing a year

I wander around my home
Fixing everything around
Into the basket go the toys
Linens set without creases neat like foys
Cushions dusted tidy and clean
Pillows arranged in the right angles that have always been
Dining chairs forming a perfect round
Not a stray drop of water on the kitchen slab to be found
Everything to be prim
Everything to be proper
Not like this poem non-rhyming and improper

And when I stand to a corner
To admire the home all set in with all the pain
I tend to ask myself the question again
Why can't I just let it be
Afterall, who has defined what is in order
And the so called disorder
And what is it that is perfect
And who is to judge here the imperfect
Who is to say what is ordinary
And who is extraordinary
Isn't it all in the mind
And has always been so the kind
So can I just let it be
Or will it just have to end with another may be



Saturday, May 04, 2019

Hues!!

If I were to paint you my sky
Would I paint you a deep crimson red
And dream of hope
A hope as bright
That would engulf everything else in it's fold
Or would I paint you a tad amber
An ode to those abandoned mirages
Camaflouging those images into your blend
Unless my heart looks for those strokes of ashen grey
Stubborn and refusing over ages to yield
And blend the past into illusions
Which as unblemished pearls of strength are here to stay
Similar to the black night sky carpeted with innumerable stars
Which are always present hidden or otherwise
Or may be I will color you deep burgundy
Arrogantly embracing head-on
Every color that comes it's way
Yet remaining the alluring violet that is everyone's fantasy
Unscathed eccentric free
But my mind sometimes yearns to paint you a soothing blue
With whitish clouds adorning that canvas of yours
Reinstating the profoundness of simplicity
Amplifying that happiness and peace
Hidden somewhere deep within
And if I blend in all the hues
With a stroke of each
Will it enhance your beauty
Signifying the color of light maybe
Unfolding every shade of the hue into a rainbow
And make life seemingly beautiful as we know it
With each one holding on to their bit of the hued sky










Wednesday, May 01, 2019

Fog!!

She said to her friend... 
Good bye then!! 

And her friend said... 

"Life is long and world is a small place. We will meet soon.... "

But she believed in the opposite... 

That "Life is short and world is too big. We will never meet again... "

She smiled to herself and remembered the same friend's lines... On a wintery morning... The fog you are seeing was never there... It's only your state of mind... 

True that!! She wondered why she even looked for the fog... 

She always knew it was never there.....all these years.....but it reminded her of her friend.... And she stuck to her belief that....that lone childhood friend of hers who had priced anger over her friendship must be also looking for the fog perhaps.....sometimes maybe.... She must be also remembering her whenever the winter fog must be clouding the window panes...and must be trying to smell the fog.... Just the way she had taught her friend when they were kids... 

Or maybe that was just a belief... And the fog never even mattered...it just never mattered afterall.... And was never there....

She turned and told her friend.... "Goodbye"






Monday, April 22, 2019

A compliment!!

Few years back a doctor had instructed her... 

My child....scream....scream as much as you want....that will help you endure the pain....

But she never could scream....

And the doctor had said.... My girl you are really brave!! 

She never took the compliment.....

******************************************

Few years later....doctor told her 4 year old Son....

My child... You are so brave... Haven't seen a child not scream and cry for two consecutive injections....

And this time she took the compliment.....

Sunday, April 21, 2019

Wind Chime!!

In the midst of chaos of change
When your soul craves for those moments of strength
The sound of my trinkets will take you to those treasured moments
Stored somewhere in the crevices of your mind
To that farewell gift from that unknown wrinkled lone face to a 5 yr old on a station platform
To that handful of sweetened dried rice as a parting blessing from an old known hand
To that parting tinkling gift from that old head nurse
And to those moments....for good or bad....  that never parted with the present
For memories like my tinkling sound shall only remain constant
And rest shall all fade away with no traces
For when the chapters of the book unfold further
Wherein previous chapters can't be retraced
And your mind searches for coherence between them
When the crests are too high to conquer
And the troughs are too low to fathom
I shall remind you of those moments of numbness that you had battled
And those moments of attachments that made you smile
For when the wind is strong
The melody of my sound is the loudest
So, when those little lines criss crossing across the palm become undecipherable
My soothing sound housed with memories will disentangle them all
For my sound shall always remain unblemished through the tides of time
In silences and chaos
In calmness and storm
My sound shall always remain by your side
And take you to that Utopian world of mine
Wherein all the mirages of mind are endorsed